The one thing you want
by Yellowtail555
Summary: ...is exactly what you can't get. Bellatrix just wants her master, not all this nonsence with Rodolphus and her family.


**For Gamma, 'cause you're an awesome friend. Hope you enjoy it! And my first time writing Bellamort so... excuse me if it sucks ;) Please R&R.**

Bellatrix didn't care anymore, she had already given up on so many others. Sweeping her gaze across her fellow Death Eaters; Cissy, who was- and had always been- foolishly trusting, Lucius, a man too obsessed with himself to properly preform his duties, Severus, an almost certain traitor, and... Rodolphus, there was nothing she could say about her "husband"; her eyes landed on the man she'd been waiting to see, and who was impossible to miss. The Dark Lord himself.

Rodolphus might be the man she'd eventually go home to every night, giddy with excitement over the fun she'd just had, and the first person she saw in the morning as he made coffee in the kitchen, always giving her a steaming mug... but he was in no way her husband. Legally, yes- they were married. But her heart had never belonged to him and honestly... never would.

For the Dark Lord was the one she fantasized about, drumming her fingers on the windowsill of her office as she practiced spells on rats she'd trapped. Her room- not Rodolphus's. Sometimes late at night, he'd creep into her room and slide in beside her but she always would then wait till he was asleep and snatch the blankets to go sleep on the couch. Sometimes she asked herself why she didn't just curse him then and there and get it done and over with but she'd pushed those thoughts out of her head by the next time she saw the Dark Lord.

Cissy thought her sick, just because her sister had always liked her husband didn't mean Bella had to. Narcissa had a kid, for crying out loud, who she cherished more than anything else. Bellatrix didn't understand it, how the girl she'd always crept around with after hours at Hogwarts to find some Gryffindor prefect to jinx could just... turn on her. And it wasn't that she wanted to still do those sorts of things but if Cissy had moved on, so could Bella. But in her own way, a way that involved her master.

Rodolphus knew, he wasn't an idiot, but what was he to do? Order her to stay home? The very idea made her laugh and Voldemort swept his steady gaze to interlock with hers. What was it the group was discussing? Oh yes, the... sudden disappearance of a pesky witch, Bathilda Bagshot. But her and the Dark Lord had kept their... errr... late stays pretty hushed up. When he asked her to stay late everyone else assumed she was just doing her job as his right hand man, working on plans kept secret to the rest of them.

And no one needed to know what was going on between them, no one at all. It wasn't fully her fault for falling in every night because his words: compliments and praise, they made her drunk on her own bliss. This war, that's what she'd been practicing for her whole life and he understood that, he knew what made her as happy as a little kid getting an A on their paper and what made her hex everything in sight. He knew that what made her maddest was her family, the way that Andy just decided one day that she didn't want to be a Black and quit, like that was even an option. How Cissy didn't want to talk to her like they use to now that she had a "real" family she could call her own. How her idiot of a cousin, Sirius, could just up and be a Gryffindor like that wasn't the greatest shame of all and act like he didn't care, as if he _liked_ it. As for Reg, well... no one really knew about Regulus. He seemed loyal... but he was a mystery.

The meeting was wrapping up and she simply blinked as her master opened his mouth to speak but it wasn't the all too familiar, "Madam Lestrange, we need to discuss matters..." No, instead he just barked, "Too many of our own have been found, you need to keep quiet, don't start anything rash." And with that, he whipped around and left the room. She stared, mouth open as he left her and an arm snaked around her waist and turned her around.

"Come on," Rodolphus whispered, "I'll drive you home."


End file.
